lamboblogging

I recently moved somewhat near a freeway and the number of insanely loud cars is insanely insane.

I'm a guy, but whenever one passes my house my loins tenderize with the thought of the manly free-spirit behind the wheel who doesn't live by society's rules. Sure, it causes me to miss 5 full seconds of any other sound whatsoever... and sometimes wakes me from a dead sleep making it tough to fall back asleep in so much excitement, but it's worth it!

The blaring whine, screaming "Look at me! Look at me! Hey everybody, are you looking at me? Do you see me?" seems to send a subliminal, primitive signal to anyone within a quarter mile that a real alpha is nearby. And while the increase in noise is always exponentially higher to any actual increase in speed, I assume that's done on purpose to give everyone more time to see them.

I'll be honest, once they've passed that minivan - who obviously has no right to be on the same asphalt as them - and let off the accelerator turning their Charger/Import/Supercar into the world's loudest popcorn machine, a little poop comes out sometimes... but it's clearly from exhilaration.

I imagine any women in Los Angeles that leaves the house must just be in a constant state of arousal and marinating their entire commute? Do you just not worry about it and leave a trail everywhere you go like you just got out of a pool? Do you pack a dozen panties in your purse and change every time you get where you're going? How do you stay dry while constantly surrounded by such incredible masculinity?

Submitted March 19, 2021 at 08:55AM by 818sAndHeartburn https://ift.tt/3lwzX2E